This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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