I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
