it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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