It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
