I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Let's get the cat blown out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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