we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Randomize
