Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize