i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.