so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
