going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
