Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
