i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
