Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
