why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
