i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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