My friends, they love my intelligence
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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