he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
