All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
