Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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