Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I love you. Go after that dick
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