I love black thongs
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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