if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize