barbara walters just said penis...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
