Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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