no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize