im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
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maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
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You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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