I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
