Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize