Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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