I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
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We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
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He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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