I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
