hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
