I didn't shave. On purpose
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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