I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
