remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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