Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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