It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize