Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
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