Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I just had sex on a roof
This toilet bowl is my home.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
