normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize