cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
