Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
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On my way to the DMV to get arrested
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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