Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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