Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
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