tell your sister to shave her snatch
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
