When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
