Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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