Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
