You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
