The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
